Posted by: Sharon | November 9, 2009

Growing pains

I’ve been trying to write this post for a while now but have had a difficut time trying to put things into words.

Pains to be exact. Or maybe frustrations? How about a little bit of sadness? As I realize more and more that I am growing up. And while before I might have depended on other people to look out for me, now I’m expected to take care of myself and other people too.

I know that sounds ridiculous and whiny, but I guess it really boils down to that, and believe me, it feels that way too…

I guess it really hit home the other week when we had a visitor. And as we were all sitting around, us thirty-club members, our guest a late twenty something, dinner time approached. A few years prior, I might have looked around and waited to see what mom was cooking up for us to eat.

But wait…

I am the mom now. And not with a little bit of bitterness for having to be the one to run the household, and not without a lot of resentment for the double standards that lock me into accepting the the fact that as much as I might hate it, I still see it as my role, to be homemaker and mother.

And as much as I don’t want to physically do it, emotionally, I really want this. To be the mother my mom was to me. Is now.

It’s just taking a while for me to adapt. And it’s hurting a bit (sort of a dull ache) to let go of childhood and welcome the responsibilities of being (gasp) an adult.

So I guess the only question left is, does anyone have any cheese to go with my wine?

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Responses

  1. Awwww Sharona…You’re doing a great job and you’re a great mom:-) I can’t say that I know what it’s like (or that I ever will), but I can tell you that I’m proud of you. Hang in there…and remember: Auntie Caro is only a few hours away:-)


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